Thoughts on College and Goals

Today is the first day of classes and I’m not there. This is the first time in 19 years that I will not be attending some type of school and it sucks.

There are some people who truly do not enjoy school. They go because they know that’s how they will reach their goals or they go because they have to. I know a number of people who are like this in college. They loathe classes and wish it would be break forever. I mean, I have similar thoughts during the summer, but now that the semester is actually starting up and I am not there, it’s terrifying.

I have always enjoyed school. Sure, in middle and high school, it wasn’t my favorite, but that’s to be expected. And of course, I didn’t always want to go to my classes in college, but once again, everyone has those days. Now that I really have no choice, it’s horrible. I don’t have a job either so that’s some of the problem. I’m waiting for replies to my resumes and applications, but so far, it hasn’t happened. This means I’m sitting at home, crocheting a lot, and watching House at a terrifyingly fast pace. I try and read in the morning and blog to keep my mind working, but I can feel it slowing down.

Being 22 and out of school and not have applied to grad school yet, it’s a terrifying wide open space with no answers. I try to make a list of things I do want to accomplish in the next five years or so. I’m going to publish them here so I can maybe set myself to achieving these goals. If any of you readers have some thoughts or suggestions, please comment. (These are in no particular order).

1) Read more books
2) Blog at least two times a week
3) Have readers care enough to comment on said blogs
4) Work on that novel!
5) Find a job to pay bills
6) Find volunteer hours that maybe relates to helping women and children
7) Find a job that is involved with my career goal as social activist
8) Go to Grad school for something
9) Open an Etsy account and sell my crocheted work

So there’s 8. Some of them like 5 and 7 might have to happen with a length of time in between them, but hey, at least there’s a list.

Not being in school right now is boring and it’s hard to make myself read intellectual books without a professor assigning them to me. I’m a self-starter, but it’s nice to have at least somebody who will have a discussion about the book with me. I just finished Bad Feminist by Roxanne Gay, which proved to be interesting and thought provoking though most of it I had heard before. I’m trying, but it’s difficult.

If you are going to be starting college, please realize that the education you receive there will change you and that is good. If you’re a major that will actually end you up with a job, good for you! Don’t be afraid to take some liberal arts classes too. You shouldn’t undervalue something that will change the way you look at the world around you. Never close your mind to knowledge. If you’ve graduated, any words of advice? How are you guys holding up and did you achieve your goals or did you find something better that you would not have even imagined right out of Undergrad?

I’m going to go watch way too many House episodes now and crochet the day away.

Daily Prompt: What My Best Friend Taught Me

What’s the most important lesson you’ve learned from the person you’re the closest to?

People change and that’s okay.

This wasn’t something Ali told me one day, but it was something I had to learn when we both entered college. 

We go to school three hours away from each other. We never went to High School together, but she lived ten minutes away from me. We hung out and told each other everything. We weren’t over at each other’s houses every weekend, but we saw each other every week at Youth Group and we were able to catch up then. She was wanted by almost all the guys in her school, dating a few of them, but not taking advantage of her prospects like I would have. She never did more than hold these guys’ hands while I was on the edge in my school, dating people from her school and those who dated me hoping to get closer to her.

I was never jealous, somehow. Our friendship wasn’t based on one up-ing each other and we didn’t need to be in close proximity. I had a friend at my school who I had sleepovers with each other where we sat trying to tell each other better stories than the other and though we went to the same college, our differences didn’t make it. I haven’t talked to her thoroughly in four years. 

Ali, on the other hand, is still my best friend. We hardly talk, but I would still consider her the best. I went to school the year before her and I wasn’t happy. I didn’t make friends right off the bat. I go to a party school and I love being by myself with a few close friends that I can see when I choose to. A party would be too overwhelming and I didn’t drink. In High School, I said I might when I get to school, but this never happened.

Cue Ali going to school. She was against drinking and drugs. When I told her I might drink in college she was disgusted. She said she wasn’t interested in it though she would judge me. Two weeks into her first semester, I get a call. She got drunk, cheated on her boyfriend, and didn’t know what to do.

Whoa.

Let me tell you, I helped her out with the boyfriend issue. They ended up breaking up and she had an on and off thing with the other guy. She went out on the weekends and made friends. I had a small group of friends, but it was a stable, happy life. I was okay with it and was dating a guy I had been with since High School. I knew that people thought I was crazy and needed to get out of my old life, but if I had done something different, it would have been a downward spiral.

We began to fight. I told her that she needed to realize what she was doing to herself before it got worse. I pointed out that she wasn’t happy and was always complaining about her life. She needed to get her life together and stop acting the way she was.

She retaliated. She told me I was stuck in this life and relied on my boyfriend too much and needed to stop being so anti-social. It seemed like the fight would continue, but Ali wasn’t a friend I wanted to lose. Though I had made new friends, there was nothing like Ali. Ali and I just got along and this was the first fight I had ever had. 

I brought my anger back and told her that I wasn’t interested in a life like that. I’d be willing to go out to parties, but it’s not a big interest of mine. I was glad that she was doing well in school and that I was in a different way. I told her I was only concerned with her happiness. She texted back and told me that wasn’t what she expected and said she was fine and she was looking at her ups and downs as a learning experience. She said that she complained about it to complain. She didn’t have a problem with her life.

End of story.

We’re still friends despite our differences. She ended up reigning in during her second semester and I make sure that when we go to parties together I do drink and she realizes her limit. Generally, I end up drinking more anyway, so there hasn’t been a problem. She’s taught me a lot, but this was an important lesson. We keep changing, but it doesn’t stop us from still staying friends and learning to accept each others differences.

I Ate My Weight in Uttapam

…No, I didn’t. It was good though. If you haven’t heard of this Southern Indian Delicacy, it tastes like a potato pancake mixed with a pizza. It was the only food I liked in India and I got it if it was available.

I went to India!

Without a camera, so I have no pictures. I can steal pictures from others which I will do soon in my next post. Right now, I’m just checking in with those who read this.

I did have some interesting experiences. I went in a tuk-tuk an experienced the fear of almost dying. For those of you that don’t know….

They’re even scarier in real life considering the traffic.

I survived despite the crazy, cringe-worthy traffic.  It was around 70-80 degrees, so that was a nice difference from the snow of New York. Right now it’s near white out conditions in good ol’ Oswego. I’m missing the heat. I really am.

First day of classes, so I should go to those. Found out there’s a Harry Potter class and I’m not signed up for it. I’m off to figure out what this class is, if it fits in my schedule, and make possible threats so I can manage to get into it. Hopefully, it won’t overload my English classes. (Fingers crossed!)

A GIANT Carmel Mocha Latte to End the Day

Do any readers work at the library? And if you do, do you enjoy it? I’m always unsure about it. This is my fourth year working at the college library. I’m able to surf the internet during down time and when I’m not, I’m answering really dumb questions or checking in/out books/laptops/mice/headphones/dvds and so on. This will be time to blog when I have a few seconds.

First day of classes! It’s all of that excitement and dread all in one. Considering I had an English class, I couldn’t wait to meet the professor. I believe with this school, the English Department is a hit or miss. I’ve had really awesome English professors, but I’ve also had horrible, never again English professors. Literary Criticism was one of those classes where the response I had to the requirement was “uhhh”. It was one of those subjects that made me feel really stupid and the first day of class did this too.

I consider myself a reader, but I do not discriminate against Young Adult books and will read almost anything (look at my Goodreads account) whether or not it’s considered “literature”. This guy slammed all of this down and told us how he felt about that and then shared his summer reading list for half of the class and the other half was showing us all of the languages he could speak. Of course, he was not pretentious at all, just showing us what it meant to be literate. I sat and picked at my cuticles (I didn’t even know what cuticles were until this class) until he called on me. Of course, I didn’t know the answer. He then asked many of us if we read 10 books this summer. I said no. Usually, I would have read way over ten books, but if you’ve been reading, I worked at a summer camp with no breaks. (I do believe I did read about 9 books this summer, but I didn’t want to let him know which ones because I’m sure they weren’t up to his standards).

Obviously, I didn’t like the professor, but I’m hopeful. Maybe he does this to scare away the people who aren’t going to work well. The only other professor for the class is even worse, but I’ll handle it as I always do. Hopefully, tomorrow goes better. Three classes that are an 1 hour and 20 minutes each! YAY!

Maybe tomorrow I’ll ramble on about what you should and shouldn’t do at the library. It has potential.

Daily Prompt- The Life of Learning

Daily Prompt-Fifteen Credits

Buying numerous journals with pages waiting to be filled and books ready to be cracked open (most of the time already used and abused) is my favorite time of the year.

It may be because I’m in college now and not in High School, but I love being in school. It gets stressful and I’m always excited for summer by April, but while the semester is going on, I’m happy and loving the new things I learn.

Honestly, I feel that I’ll be a professional student with the way my education is going. I’m going into my fourth major change (though my original major) and picking up two minors to go into my fourth year of college. I like to jump around and it’s not to find something I like because I’m interested in everything. I’ve been in Creative Writing, Childhood Education, Journalism, and now Creative Writing. Revisiting this major is nothing like the first time. I’m picking up Women Studies and am very interested in what I can do with that. I want to change the world and school is an important instrument to me.

I don’t know when I’ll finally graduate and I have no clue what career I’ll settle into. Maybe I will decide college is for me and become a professor. Whichever I choose, I’m excited for the beginning of the semester (though not excited to say good-bye to the summer weather). I love school so much I have a hard time dealing with people my age who are not in college. I immediately ask them what in the world they’re doing with their time and how they wouldn’t want college. I get to be selfish. My parents are away and I don’t have to listen to them. I get to figure out how to get by with my Library Job and an apartment. But I also get to gather new experiences and feel that I can focus on myself. I couldn’t imagine doing anything else.